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Writer's pictureMouniirah DEME

«Start with Why»: What I have learned.

I believe that one of the most significant questions that everyone faces in their life is the question of WHY? Why am I here? Why am I doing what I do? Why me? Why now? Why this instead of that? At a certain point in my life, I was struggling to find my purpose and wondered if I was on the right path. I realized later that these difficulties were partially due to the fact that most of my decisions were based on others' expectations rather than following my own 'why.' However, after reading Simon Senek's book, «Start With Why», everything became much clearer. I was able to focus on what truly mattered and approach it with even more determination, now that I understood why it was important. I was hesitant to write too much, considering how valuable your time is. So, instead of providing a summary of the book, I have combined the concepts and key takeaways that resonated with me. Thank you for joining me. It is always a pleasure to have you.



  • Why is it important to find your why?

Understanding your why is crucial as it provides the underlying motivation and purpose behind your actions and decisions. It is the driving force that fuels your passion and gives meaning to your life. Your why acts as a personal mission statement, keeping you focused on what truly matters to you. Knowing your why is the first step in achieving your goals, finding the courage to take risks, staying motivated during tough times, and creating a fulfilling and rewarding life. Friedrich Nietzsche emphasized the importance of knowing your why by saying:

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.

Before you begin any task, take a moment to reflect on the reasons behind it. Why do you wake up every day? Why do you do what you do? Why here and not there? Why this and not that? Why should anyone care about it?


  • How to find your why?

Discovering one's purpose may not be as simple as it appears. However, fret not, as here are five steps to assist you in uncovering your purpose.


Step 1: Reflect on your passions and interests

Ask yourself these questions:

  1. What have I enjoyed doing since an early age?

  2. What hobbies or interests am I drawn towards in my free time?

  3. What brings me joy and fulfillment?

  4. What activities energize me?

  5. Are there any causes or issues that ignite a fire within me?

  6. What do I consider to be meaningful work?

Take note of how you feel when considering these questions. If you feel a sudden surge of energy and excitement or a strong sense of clarity and purpose, it indicates that you are on the right path. If you are unsure, try out various activities and causes to see which ones bring out the best in you. You will naturally be more inclined towards certain things than others.


Step 2: Identify your core values.

Your core values are the principles or beliefs that guide your behavior, decisions, and actions. Making your values crystal clear will help you stay true to yourself and make decisions that align with who you are. To identify your deepest values, ask yourself:

  1. What matters to me most in life?

  2. When I make decisions, which principles or beliefs guide my choices?

  3. Which qualities do I find vital in myself and others?

  4. What are my pet peeves (i.e., things I can’t stand out of principle)?

Once identified, rank your values by importance, and indicate those that are non-negotiable.


Step 3: Look for patterns in past experiences.

Reflect on past experiences where you felt fulfilled or accomplished. Look for similarities in these moments, such as helping others or solving complex problems. Consider if you found satisfaction in mentoring or teaching, volunteering for social causes, or assisting those in need. Pay attention to any insights or realizations about yourself that arise. Also, think about how these patterns relate to your passions, interests, and core values. This will help you better understand your motivations.



Step 4: Visualize your ideal future

Visualize yourself five or ten years from now, living a fulfilling life of purpose where your passions, interests, and core values are fully integrated. Having a vivid picture of your ideal future can help you identify your why and clarify the direction you want your life to go. Visualization can be an incredibly powerful tool for understanding what truly matters to you and the direction you want your life to take.


Step 5: Craft your personal mission statement

By integrating all the insights from the previous steps, create a personal mission statement that outlines your why. Ask yourself:

  • What’s the common denominator?

  • What do all my passions, interests, values, and future visions have in common?

  • What is the deeper purpose behind everything?

  • What is it that I really want?

  • How would I describe my true identity?

Your mission statement should be concise and specific enough to guide future decisions while remaining flexible as you continue to grow and develop throughout your life. For example, take a look at the author's Why: “Inspire people to do the things that inspire them!”


  • Carrots vs. Sticks.

“There are only two ways to influence human behavior: you can manipulate it or you can inspire it.”

The carrot and stick theory suggests that there are two ways to influence someone's behavior: through rewards for positive behavior and punishments for negative behavior. However, this theory goes beyond simple incentives and consequences. In the modern context, this approach involves using various techniques, such as rewards and punishments, to encourage a desired behavior. It is commonly used in management and politics. But this is somehow a form of manipulation and as the author said:

“Manipulations lead to transactions, not loyalty.”

To become a great leader, you have to be one of those who inspire others. Inspirational leaders prioritize understanding the purpose behind their work and then focus on the methods and actions required. In successful companies, the central focus is on the why behind their actions and communication.



  • The Golden Circle.

The golden circle is an alternative approach to manipulation. It is based on the concept of the golden ratio and describes how leaders and organizations can achieve success by understanding their central purpose. Inspirational leaders prioritize understanding why they do their work, and from there, determine how and what they do. In successful companies, the why is at the core of their actions and communication.

  1. The WHY: Understanding the WHY and core values of your organization is important for a leader. People are more motivated by the reasons behind their actions rather than the actions themselves.

  2. The HOW: Achieving organizational goals involves taking specific actions, such as hiring the best professionals or sourcing high-quality materials.

  3. The WHAT: Any organization can easily understand the products or services they offer, but that alone is not enough for success.


  • Start with Why, but know How.

“Energy excites. Charisma inspires.”

Energy is easy to see, measure, and copy. All great leaders have charisma because all great leaders have clarity of “Why”; and an undying belief in a purpose or cause bigger than themselves. Behind every “Why” type of leader, is a “How” type of leader who brings the “Why” to life. “Why” types are the visionaries with overactive imaginations. They tend to be optimists who believe that everything they can imagine can be accomplished and they tend to be focused on things most people can’t see, like the future. “How” types instead are more practical and more realistic and tend to be focused on the things most people can see and tend to be better at building them. The difference between “Why” and “How” types also introduces the difference between the vision and mission statements of an organization. The vision is the founder’s intent, “Why” the company was founded. The mission is a description of “How” the company will create that future. When both are clear, it will help the “Why” and the “How” type of leaders to have clearly defined roles in the partnership. And once you have your why, you know how, all that's left is to find the tools and actions to implement, your what. Remember that it's not just what you do and why you do it that counts, the most important thing is that the what and how are consistent with your why. It is also of utmost importance to recognize the significance of effective communication in order to ensure clarity and comprehension among your audience.


Dear reader, the process of finding your WHY is a journey of exploration, not something that can be created. Your WHY is something that resides within you. It is important for you to find it so that you can live a fulfilled life and all the difficulties that come your way will be easier to deal with. As Nietzsche states: “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” Thank you for reading and I hope you find value in this message. May you be blessed and take care.

 

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